The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #45: Cherry Cheese Charmer

Howdy, Jigglers! This next recipe was chosen for me to make by my brother in law, who came to visit the other week and loves cherries. He never has mentioned that cherry is his favorite fruit flavor, but every time I ask what kind of dessert he wants me to make when he comes over, it is invariably cherry-rich, which works just fine for me. I was actually thankful to have somebody else around to choose a vintage Jell-O recipe for me, since if I were choosing for myself, I probably would have chosen something a little more daring and less promising.

Anyhow, this recipe is a combination of some of my favorite Jell-O techniques: whipped gelatin, dessert gelatin with just a hint of savory flavor, and fruit mixed in to fluffy gelatin. That said, I did have to make a couple of changes to the recipe. 

After the Coca Cola gelatin and the Cherry Charlotte Russe, I had had about enough of dark sweet cherries in gelatin. They always make the gelatin a brownish color, and their flavor is a little insipidly sweet and flat for me. So I replaced the can of dark sweet cherries with one can of cherry pie filling and one small jar of maraschino cherries. For the cherry syrup, I used the juice from the maraschino cherries, and I heated up the pie filling and added a quarter of a cup of water to it to get the syrup to separate from the fruit.

Then I made my usual substitution of two tablespoons of unflavored gelatin for the Jell-O, and the rest of the recipe I made as written.

Though I am sure the optional layering method would be attractive, I didn't want to make this recipe any more complicated than was necessary, so I didn't take that route. The method has a few steps, but it was easy enough to do. It took a bit of time to blend the cream cheese and the gelatin, it takes quite a few minutes to whip the gelatin sufficiently, and you have to watch carefully to make sure the gelatin doesn't set too much before whipping, but as long as you are patient and diligent about it, it's pretty simple. It also fit just about perfectly into my preferred mold.

The result? Fluffy. Rich. Attractive. And so pink! Just take a look.

I had maybe a quarter cup of gelatin leftover after filling my mold, just for your information. I was quite pleased, by the way, with how well this whipped mixture took the shape of the mold. Also pleasant was the degree to which the syrup from the cherries flavored the gelatin. It's always a challenge to substitute the flavoring provided by Jell-O in a way that is neither too weak or too strong, but this combination of maraschino cherry juice and cherry pie filling syrup worked terrifically.

As you can see, the cream cheese didn't blend totally seamlessly into the gelatin, but this  didn't result in weird chunks of pure cream cheese or anything, so I didn't mind whatsoever. My brother in law's reaction was also very positive.

The blurb about the recipe in the book is quite appropriate--this is a special recipe that certainly charmed me. In fact, it would be a great, somewhat lighter-than-usual Valentine's Day treat. I rate it as an excellent addition to the Joys of Jell-O anthology, though of course with the caveat that it would probably not be nearly as good with dark sweet cherries.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #1: Hawaiian Dessert

Howdy, Jigglers! At long last I was able to return to the very first recipe in Joys of Jell-O: Hawaiian Dessert. I was planning to do the first recipe first, as I did all the other recipes in numerical order for a good while when I was starting this adventure, but I skipped it due to not having a blender. Now I have a very nice blender, so that and having a leftover can of pineapple finally convinced me that it was time for recipe #1.

When it says that this dish is ready to serve quickly, they aren't kidding. I made the recipe as written, only substituting unflavored gelatin and the juice of one lime for lime Jell-O. If I made this again, though, I would definitely add a tablespoon or two of sugar. It was dead simple to make, but I was in for a big surprise when I tried to extricate the gelatin from the blender: due to the ice and efficient blending, the gelatin was already completely set once the blender turned off, so when I tried pouring it out of the blender, absolutely nothing came out. After a couple of moments of disbelief, I had to scoop the stuff out, and then it was ready to serve. I refrigerated it anyway, but it did not set up further.

Do you see how this dessert looks a little like shredded, wet insulation? Well, that's sort of what it tastes like. It is tart-sweet, but the overwhelming impression it gives you is chunky. Even when judiciously blended, pineapple stays slightly fibrous and, well, just chunky, and the gelatin keeps the whole mixture solid, which strongly reminded me of insulation for some reason, like if you flavored and moistened that fluffy stuff in your walls then ate it.

That resemblance aside, this dish isn't bad--it's just not very good, either. I like the flavor combination of pineapple, lime, milk, and almond, but the texture is so offputting that I couldn't truly enjoy it.

The appearance of the Hawaiian Dessert is a bit strange, too. Since it set up immediately upon being blended, I had no choice but to pile it up in glasses, which does make it look fluffy, I guess, but it certainly doesn't have the sleek, clean look of most gelatin.

If you want some tropical flavor and need a gelatin dessert FAST, I recommend the Hawaiian Dessert, except I think it would be better with a little extra sugar and some coconut milk in place of dairy milk, or at least half-and-half for more creaminess. However, this recipe is one of the lowest on the list of gelatin dishes that I would make again. The flavors just aren't enough to overcome the texture. Sorry, General Foods.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #37: Cherry Charlotte Russe

Howdy, Jigglers! After making the Tuna Salad, I was ready for a dessert gelatin recipe again, and in particular one featuring ladyfingers, since I had a package of ladyfingers lying around and ladyfingers + Jell-O is always a wonderful combination. It's like a cheater's sponge cake. In the end I chose Cherry Charlotte Russe, a creamy, fruity dish studded with nuts and served in individual serving dishes.

The ingredients for this dish were fairly easy to replicate in a healthier fashion. I left the ladyfingers, whipped cream, and pecans exactly as they were, but instead of cherry Jell-O, I used unflavored gelatin in pureed cherries and two tablespoons of sugar. For the cherries I bought a bag of frozen cherries, thawed them, and then blended them up in a blender, which worked well and produced enough liquid to make the appropriate amount of gelatin. However, if you use a different type of cherry, your sugar requirements may change--maraschino cherries, for instance, would need no additional sugar, while tart cherries would need much more than a couple of tablespoons.

The method for making this recipe is standard and simple; I bloomed the gelatin in the cherry puree, added sugar, heated it up until very warm to dissolve the gelatin and sugar, refrigerated it in a bowl until slightly thick, whipped the cream in the meantime, folded  the cream and nuts into the gelatin, placed some ladyfingers into my serving dishes, scooped the gelatin mixture into said dishes, then refrigerated it all again.

The only tricky part of making this recipe, and most Jell-O recipes in general, is catching the gelatin at the correct intermediate point of setting. If you want the gelatin to only reach the slightly thickened, very thick, or set but not firm stages, you really have to keep an eye on it, as the time required for it to reach those stages varies depending upon the type of container it's in, its position in your fridge, how concentrated the actual gelatin is, and its temperature at the start of the setting process. But it always seems to me that the more frequently I check on a batch of setting gelatin, the slower it sets, but if I know it's going to take a while and I wait a long while to check it, it winds up too hardened by the time I check. Gelatin that sets too much can always be heated slightly to resoften it, but getting it right can be a little frustrating.

In this case, my gelatin may have been just slightly too soft when I mixed in the cream and pecans because it didn't marble all that attractively, but it still set up fine in the end. 

You can see, roughly, the size of serving dishes I used for all of this creamy goodness, but keep in mind that this recipe makes eleven servings of that size.

The good news is that the Cherry Charlotte Russe is so tasty that you won't have to worry about it going to waste! The cream lightens up the gelatin quite a bit while still being satisfying, and the ladyfingers really make it a special treat with their sweetness.

This dessert would be more than suitable for a spring picnic or family gathering. It feels indulgent, but, at least the way I made it, it's fairly low sugar for a dessert, and it has some real fruit and dairy in it, so it's fairly low guilt, too.

So, once again, thanks to General Foods for coming up with this winner of a recipe.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #167: Tuna Salad

Howdy, Jigglers! Today I bring you one of the JOJ recipes I was looking forward to the least--a category which is almost entirely populated by s e a f o o d. My husband and I had just gotten back from the grocery store one day last week, and I was unpacking a couple of cans of tuna when I unthinkingly asked my husband to pick out the next Jell-O recipe for me to make. He immediately pointed at the tiny can in my hand and said, "I know there are tuna Jell-O recipes. You've got it, so you have to make it happen."

For some reason my camera was not cooperating with me on photographing both the recipe and the actual salad--please bear with my cell phone photos.

We then flipped through JOJ and found Tuna Salad, which conveniently also required several other ingredients I had on hand, like olives, celery, mayonnaise, and onion. I just had to grab a cucumber and I was ready to go. At this juncture my husband also challenged me to eat the entirety of the tuna salad since there have been a few of these recipes (mostly involving tomatoes) that I have been unable to finish due to gagging too much.

I secretly was okay with the idea of the tuna salad because I recently got a fish-shaped mold for a song and was itching to try it out. There was a bit of an obstacle to overcome, though, which was how to replicate the flavor of Celery Flavor Jell-O, which hasn't been manufactured for half a century. After debating pureeing some celery to make celery juice (too much work!), I decided to replace the salt in the recipe with celery salt and call it a day, which worked out fine. Other than using the celery salt and unflavored gelatin in place of Jell-O (a word to the wise: you can find boxes of the salad Jell-O flavors on eBay, but I would certainly recommend against consuming their contents), I followed the recipe exactly, except I accidentally got a lime instead of a lemon.

The recipe was very simple to make. The only problem was that I was worried about the onion. This is the first Jell-O recipe I have made including onion, and I thought if anything was going to make the salad completely inedible, it would be raw onion bits. So I took it really easy when I was adding the onion to avoid overpowering the other flavors.

 I was pleased with how well the chunky salad molded, though it certainly looked less than appetizing on the whole. Regardless, much to my surprise (and perhaps slightly to my husband's chagrin), this salad is simply delicious! It is refreshing, rather light, and not too fishy. Plus, the gelatin works much better than your typical tuna salad at keeping the vegetables crispy, which it did all week long. The hint of lime even shone through on the palate, while the onion did not. Over all, though, I was flabbergasted by how good the olive slices were in completing the dish. I heartily advise against omitting them, as their brininess contrasts beautifully with the creamy gelatin and the other, milder vegetables.

Clearly I had no trouble finishing off the tuna salad after all! This recipe was shockingly good for what it is, and I don't even care for regular tuna salad. I also believe the De Luxe version of the salad sounds good, though I don't know how well gelatin would keep diced apple fresh. This cookbook sure does love tuna with apples, though.

In short, General Foods actually made a competent seafood Jell-O recipe. I don't know if it was brutal amounts of talent or brutal amounts of luck that did it, but I do know that I would make this again someday in a heartbeat, which is the exact opposite of what I was anticipating with Tuna Salad.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #89: Frosty Melon

Howdy, Jigglers! Of all of the recipes in JOJ with accompanying photos, Frosty Melon was probably the one I have been looking forward to the most. It looks like an abstract sculpture, and it's made up of only melon, gelatin with fruit, and cream cheese. What could go wrong?

I also love that this recipe is in the "Two-Way Salads" chapter of the book. All of these recipes basically make me think the same thing, which is that they are for people who want to think of their fruity desserts as healthy side dishes. This is a delusion with which I sympathize completely, as I also will use any excuse to play down my sweets addiction.

In any case, to make this fruity treat, I started out with a honeydew melon, a cup of mango nectar and unflavored gelatin as the filling, a can of fruit cocktail with its syrup, and of course some cream cheese. As a side note, for the longest time I had only eaten honeydew in fruit mixes and never enjoyed it, but if you get a whole melon and eat it that way, it tastes ten times more sweet and juicy than its pre-cut version, so if you haven't tried it that way, I wholly recommend it.

Making this recipe is remarkably simple, though it leaves you with a lot of leftover gelatin mix. I had enough to fill five individual serving dishes. If you wanted to avoid this, you could scoop out some of the melon flesh before filling the melon, though that would leave you with extra melon to deal with. 

 I was heartily pleased with how the final product turned out aesthetically. When I first got it assembled, it just looked like a volleyball, like so:

But once you cut into it, the concentric rings of fruit and cheese are quite nice. It does look like something one would eat in the very distant future, but who doesn't want a circular treat sometimes?

The Frosty Melon delivers in terms of taste as well. The unsweetened cream cheese accentuates the sweetness of the melon, fruit, and gelatin, and the textures mesh together surprisingly well. The cheese also helps this otherwise light dessert salad become a little more filling.

Another thought that occurred to me is that this dish would be a tasty way to model the earth or another planet for kids. You would just fill the center of a cantaloupe with red gelatin and color the cream cheese to look like the planet's surface. I love it when science and the culinary arts combine!

Whether it's for a geology lesson, a volleyball party, or just for a sweet mod picnic, the Frosty Melon is a superb "salad." Kudos to the General Foods team, and until next time, stay frosty.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #51: Orange-Mallow Ring

Howdy, Jigglers! After making the Salmon Mousse, I needed a refresher of a normal, fruity gelatin recipe, and the Orange-Mallow Ring was a simple, fun recipe that met those criteria perfectly.

Basically, this molded dessert is orange-pineapple gelatin to which mandarin orange sections (or fresh orange sections) and quartered or mini marshmallows are added. I of course substituted unflavored gelatin for Jell-O, and for the flavoring I used ginger ale as directed and added the syrup from the can of mandarin oranges and some juice from a can of pineapple that I conveniently happened to have on hand. The result was a surpringly brightly colored ring mold studded with fruit and fluffy marshmallow which was as simply pleasant to eat as it was to look at.

I was honestly rather surprised that General Foods did not instruct the addition of any further elements into this dish. Some nuts or fish or something seems like it would be more up their alley. 

At any rate, this dessert was a plain old-fashioned good idea on the part of General Foods. I especially like the combination of oranges and marshmallow. If using fresh oranges, this would provide a very tasty contrast between the tangy oranges and the marshmallows.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #149: Salmon Mousse

Howdy, Jigglers! Though today's recipe certainly sounds odd as a Jell-O dish, I had been nonetheless excited to try it for quite a while. Part of this is due to never having eaten a mousse in my life, but part of it is also due to this recipe being a cool, one-dish, low-carb meal in itself, and thus perfect for summer lunches. 

Salmon Mousse is just one variation of mousse-type salads included in this recipe. The others are chicken, ham, and tuna. However, I had not had salmon for a long time, and I had eaten a LOT of celery lately (which is the main vegetable in the other variations), so I went with the salmon, and I didn't regret it.

I essentially made this recipe as written, only substituting out unflavored gelatin with half a lemon's worth of juice for the lemon Jell-O. The basic method is simple: you prepare gelatin, adding cayenne pepper and vinegar, let it cool a bit, mix it with whipped cream and mayonnaise, and then fold in the salmon and diced cucumber. At this point you mold it and let it set.

However, I do take issue with the recipe to some extent, because while the method produced a tasty salmon salad with gelatin in it, it did not seem like much of a mousse. I believe a better way to proceed is to let the gelatin set until it has eggwhite consistency,  whip it, then add the cream and mayo and whip all three together, after which the rest of the ingredients can be incorporated. 

This way you 1) avoid globs of random gelatin strewn into the salad, 2) get a lighter, fluffier texture in general, and 3) get a better mold shape. As is, the salad somewhat adhered to the shape of my Bundt pan, but with the gelatin-mayo-cream mixture at a higher percentage of the volume of the salad mixture, the molding would be more apparent.

However, on the whole, this recipe is a success. It is a creamy, well spiced molded salad that isn't gross, and I am very grateful for that considering that I made this as my main lunch dish for a whole week, so I have to give kudos to the General Foods team for at least one sane seafood Jell-O recipe.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #36: Birthday Surprise

Howdy Jigglers. Before we get started, I am sorry to say I had a kerfuffle that resulted in me having no pictures of the finished dish of this recipe. Other than that, though, I am very excited to be reporting today on Birthday Surprise, perhaps the recipe with the most eye-catching photo in the entire Joys of Jell-O catalog! (Yes, I admit, "eye-catching" and "delicious-looking" are two different things.)

As my birthday was approaching, I figured I should treat myself in the most fitting way with this birthday cake alternative, especially given how simple it is to make. The gelatin part is literally just clear gelatin, with some ice cream inside the ring and marshmallows/gumdrops outside. In fact, it is so simple that the moniker of "Surprise" really doesn't make sense, unless you think of it in terms of giving this to someone for their birthday instead of a sweet, fluffy cake without their knowledge or consent--and let's be real here, if you knew ahead of time, you would not consent. Maybe there is someone out there who truly loves plain gelatin more than cake as a special-occasion treat, but it is just one person, and I say that as a real die-hard gelatin fanatic.

Anyhow, since the "recipe" gives you full freedom as to what flavor of gelatin to use, I decided to get a little creative and use apple juice as the basis of this dish. This is because there is no apple Jell-O flavor, and I had some caramel sauce in the refrigerator that I thought would make a nice caramel-apple effect. This is where my plans went slightly awry, though: since apple juice is very sweet, I figured the sweetness level would be about right when gelatinized, but the flavor turned out a little on the subtle side. It was not bad, but if I were to make this (or just apple gelatin in general) again, I would either include some more concentrated apple puree with the juice or cook the juice down a bit to concentrate the flavor a bit more.

Regardless, the gelatin turned out beautifully. All told I used four tablespoons of unflavored gelatin to harden an entire jug of apple juice, which made it nice and chewy, and it was a very pretty golden color. Some vanilla ice cream in the middle made a festive presentation, though ultimately I thought the combination was too rich and ended up eating the gelatin by itself with some caramel sauce. Maybe some creme fraiche would be a more appropriate filling. But for initial serving we lit birthday candles stuck into marshmallows and everything. For the record, I tried and tried but could not manage to make the marshmallow flowers as shown in the photo. If anyone out there knows how to make them, please let me know!

While I would not make this for anyone as a birthday surprise, it is a festive way to serve gelatin, it looks nice, and I'm sure it would please the palettes of a young birthday-party crowd. It would be especially useful for coordinating with a party color theme, since you can use a host of different flavors, particularly if the theme is "Candyland". A stained-glass or rainbow pattern would be especially eyecatching with the marshmallows and gumdrops. All in all, though it is not much of a recipe, the Birthday Surprise does serve as a creative inspiration for the limitless opportunities that gelatin offers.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #116: Peach and Cheese Salad

Howdy, Jigglers! I was very excited about the Peach and Cheese Salad, that I chose to make next due to already needing some cottage cheese, mostly because it is a Two-Way Recipe and I have done very few of those to date. The concept of recipes that are versatile enough to be salad or dessert is interesting, though I know many of them may not succeed in that capacity.

At any rate, this recipe combines quite a few standard Jell-O techniques, like layered molding, mixing fruit in gelatin, and whipping gelatin, but it is still simple to make. It was also simple to swap out some ingredients to make the whole thing slightly healthier: I used unflavored gelatin instead of Jell-O (two tablespoons in total), and for the cherry flavoring I replaced half of the water with the syrup from a can of cherries, after which I threw the cherries themselves into the mix for good measure. I know the cherries basically don't show up in the photos, but just trust me. In addition, since there was no added sugar in the gelatin, I added two tablespoons of white sugar to the cottage cheese. Other than that, I followed the recipe as written.

 The first thing I noticed while making this recipe is that cottage cheese doesn't become smooth after mixing. Perhaps it would if you got your electric beaters in there, but that sounded like a kitchen disaster waiting to happen, so I just left it slightly chunky, which was fine. The other thing I didn't expect is that the cherry syrup turned a lavender color when whipped--I would have thought it would be a maroon or dusty rose color, but it turned really purple. That's not a bad thing, but it is just a bit disconcerting when you first see it. I imagine you could use maraschino cherry syrup to achieve a more red/pink look and a sweeter taste.

Tastewise, this "salad" is pretty good! The cottage cheese does add a nice creamy, savory taste, which goes nicely with the fruit. There is plenty of textural contrast as well, between the cheese, whipped gelatin--which is foamy but somehow slightly firm as well, regular gelatin, and fruit. Plus it makes a pleasant presentation, though with the whipped gelatin it is a bit difficult to cleanly serve a portion.

 If you wanted to serve this as a salad, I would highly recommend omitting the sugar that I added, filling the center of the mold with additional cottage cheese (as seen in the photo from the book), and serving each piece atop some mixed greens, perhaps with a light drizzle of vinaigrette. For a dessert, it is good as is, but a scoop of vanilla ice cream to one side would take the whole thing over the top.

So here is the second Two-Way Recipe (the first being Applesauce De Luxe) that can actually work as intended! I especially like that you can create a gelatin salad without a lot of added sugar to create a dish that is more substantial and filling than your typical gelatin affair. General Foods, color me impressed.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #130: Under-the-Sea Salad

Howdy, Jigglers! When my husband picked out the Under-the-Sea Salad to be my next Jell-O adventure, I grimaced a bit. I was picturing some lime gelatin mixed with vinegar and vegetables, and probably some seafood thrown in for extra "Why?" factor. Thankfully, the only part of that image included in this recipe was the lime.

This "salad" is really more like a not-so-sweet dessert, with a clear layer of slightly salted lime gelatin molded with a layer of slightly salted lime gelatin, pear chunks, a hint of ginger, and cream cheese. I can only assume the name comes from the image of white sand beneath a green sea with some dead stuff buried in the sand, but I make no claim as to the accuracy of that rationale.

Anyhow, I made this recipe basically as written, only substituting the juice of three limes, a tablespoon and a half of unflavored gelatin, and two tablespoons of granulated sugar for the Jell-O. As I had ripe, fresh pears on hand, I used that instead of the canned pears and pear syrup. However, I certainly think this is just about the only salad Jell-O recipe where I could see the end result turning out well with commercial Jell-O, because the lime flavor isn't that bad. I would probably add some real lime juice regardless, though, but I just really like limes.

This was the first recipe out of TJOJ that I've made to have distinct layers, and a word to the wise: keep an eye on that Jell-O! I normally have a "the watched pot never boils" experience with getting gelatin to set to a given degree, but it all depends on the mold you are using. In this case, I planned on making the whole thing in my Bundt pan, but then I forgot and put it in my mini ring molds instead. Those things are so small that the gelatin was set but not firm in five minutes instead of the two hours that the technical guide in the book states. So keep in mind that those guidelines are geared towards one big mold, and act accordingly.

Luckily, since the molds are so small, there was no issue of the fruit floating or sinking in the cream cheese layer once I added it, even though the cheese layer was not even close to set--there was simply nowhere for those pear chunks to go. And lo and behold, the two layers connected but didn't mix, which is a big success for me! Maybe I set the bar too low for myself.

Anyway, I was very pleased with both the appearance and taste of this mold. Without any food coloring, the clear layer really does resemble sea water, and it contrasts nicely with the pure white layer of cheese. Tastewise, though, this salad is especially impressive. It is just salty/savory enough between the limes, the cheese, and the ginger to feel like a salad, but it could be used as a dessert due to the sweetness of the pears. (As an aside, if you made this using canned pears/syrup and actual Jell-O, it would probably turn out sweet enough to easily pass for a dessert.) Plus, the addition of the cream cheese makes the whole dish feel more substatial and filling.

All in all, the Under-the-Sea Salad was a smashing look at the more savory possibilities of gelatin. I think the key to these kinds of recipes is to play to gelatin's strengths instead of trying to mimic preexisting recipes. In this instance, you've got a combination of textures (clear and creamy), a logical combination of flavors (lime, pear, ginger, cheese), and a balance between savory and sweet that doesn't involve vinegar. That is a win in my book, so congratulations to the General Foods team for scheming up (or more likely ripping off) a genuinely great recipe.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #158: Tomato Pineapple Surprise

Howdy Jigglers. To be completely honest here, I have been putting off writing about Tomato Pineapple Surprise for a while, simply because I don't want to think about it again. But I figure I need to do it sometime, because until it's done, I feel guilty throwing the stuff away, and having it in my refrigerator is much worse than thinking about it.

Based on my experiences with the Quick Tomato Mold, I was none too pleased when my husband picked this out as my next Jell-O recipe, but my spirits were somewhat uplifted when I saw the pineapple variation, especially as I already had some pineapple in the freezer, and at least I had some nice fresh tomatoes to stew up.

So I stewed them up with just a little salt, sugar, and parsley, and I made the rest of the recipe as written, substituting the lemon Jell-O for unflavored beef gelatin flavored with a splash of lemon extract. The tomatoes smelled amazing the entire time they were cooking, as well as mixed with pineapple, vinegar, and allspice. And no, I didn't mold this in the can, since I didn't have any cans due to the fresh tomatoes and leftover pineapple. I was hoping that this would make a decent vegetable side dish for my packed lunches, so I put most of the mixture into small plastic food storage containers.

Tomato aspics and similar dishes always do look striking, but I have never been able to like them. The Quick Tomato Mold just tasted like pizza sauce that had been sitting out too long, and this just tasted like ketchup that had been sitting out too long. The pineapple didn't taste like anything; it only served to make the whole thing a little more chunky, which didn't help the flavor. I couldn't taste the lemon or allspice whatsoever. It. Was. Just. Chunky. Ketchup. It really tasted like that bit of congealed ketchup that gets stuck around the hinge of the ketchup squeeze bottle lid, which makes sense because the main flavors are tomato, vinegar, and sugar. But that's not a good thing.

I suppose if you were making some fancy-pants Hawaiian sliders with your King's Hawaiian bread, some melty cheese, and maybe some mayonnaise, a slice of Tomato Pineapple Surprise would make a suitable alternative to ketchup. That is about the only situation I can think of in which this would be at all palatable. I don't know what General Foods was thinking when they made this recipe, except maybe "The boss said we only have one more day to finish compiling recipes, and he says there aren't enough savory recipes yet..."

The other thing that annoyed me was the name. What in heaven's name is supposed to be surprising about this? It's gelatinized tomato, which is obvious upon a cursory glance, and it also contains pineapple, which is also not even slightly hidden. I guess "Tomato Pineapple" wouldn't be a very good name, but at least it isn't a falsehood. Another detail of note: this recipe made about two cups' worth, which is more than you'll ever need in your life.

So now that that's done, and I have a much better recipe in store for next time, I'm going to go toss the rest of the Tomato Pineapple Surprise, because I ate one of my containers of it in its entirety, and now just looking at them makes me feel ill.

The Joys of Jell-O Recipe #65: Banana Splits

Howdy, Jigglers! Sometimes, life brings you lemons and you need to make lemonade. Other times, life brings you bananas, and in that case you naturally start scouring vintage Jell-O cookbooks for a dessert that requires only cheap or free ingredients and bananas. Right?

Anyhow, that's the situation in which I found myself last week, and so I chose to make Banana Splits because I already had one lonely packet of Dream Whip, the bananas, and the gelatin. The only question was, how should I flavor the gelatin in a way that will complement whipped cream and bananas?

I briefly thought over a few standard juice flavors, but then I decided to be just a little bit more creative and tropical with a pina colada-flavored gelatin. I got a can of first-press coconut milk and a can of pineapples, of which I used the juice (stay tuned for my next post to see how I used the pineapple, and get ready to cue the scare chords) to make my breezy tropical gelatin, with only one tablespoon of sugar and one-and-a-half tablespoons of gelatin dissolved in it. If you want boozy banana splits, I imagine adding a couple of splashes of rum to the mix would really take it over the top. Other than that, I made this recipe as written, even following the Dream Whip directions to the letter. Looking at the recipe, it seems as though a maraschino cherry garnish would be appropriate, but you honestly won't miss it.

  Maybe it's my fault, but I have never had flaked gelatin turn out with a flaky texture. One time it came out merely granular, and this time "flaking" the gelatin just seemed to slice it more than anything. In this instance, it might be partially due to the higher-than-normal fat content of the gelatin, but it might also be due to the tines of my forks not being far enough apart. So my advice to anyone wanting to flake gelatin is to use a big fork, such as a serving fork, preferably with squared tine edges to achieve a decent flake.

Other than that, this recipe turned out really, really well. The creaminess of the coconut gelatin, bananas, and Dream Whip was just luxurious considering how relatively healthy it all is, and the nuts (I used pecans) provided a great textural contrast.

In terms of servings, this recipe makes enough gelatin and whipped cream to make three deluxe banana splits, four standard banana splits, or up to eight mini banana splits (using half of one banana apiece), though it certainly depends on how much coconut milk and pineapple juice you have. The way I made it, though, was quite delicious, and I commend General Foods for coming up with a tasty alternative to an ordinary ice cream-based banana split.

Way Out There Recipe #2: Hanuda Noodles (from Siren)

Howdy, Jigglers! I'm back with another strange recipe, although I have to tell you, this one contains minimal quantities of gelatin. 

This story begins with a Playstation 2 game named Siren, which is an atmospheric and notoriously slow Japanese survival horror title. At one point in the game, which takes place in a fictional town called Hanuda, you find a note bearing a recipe for a very odd bowl of ramen noodles, and you see a shibito (Siren's version of zombies) policeman chowing down on the selfsame noodles in a cafe.

I love Siren, I love cooking, and I even love ramen, so I knew I had to make this dish. The recipe is as follows (thanks to the Siren Archive Files Guide for the transcription):

Recipe For Hanuda Noodles

      Hanuda Noodles: a local specialty.  Mention Hanuda, and these noodles
      instantly come to mind.  The chewy strands are unsurpassed in firmness
      and texture.  The broth, a delicate melange of sweetness and spiciness, 
      acts as the perfect compliment to the noodles.  How to prepare Hanuda
      Noodles:

           1. Boil noodles for 3 minutes in a large pot of boiling water.
           2. Drain water and rinse noodles well in cold water.
           3. Place noodles in broth made of soup stock, chili, vinegar, sake,
              and sugar.  Top with organic strawberry jam.  Serve with
              seasonal fruits if desired.

This photo is in the game with the recipe

Now, since neither Hanuda nor its firm noodles exist in reality, I subbed in regular ramen

noodles. I of course included the seminal ingredient, strawberry jam, but I also did happen 

to have a cucumber on hand, so I put in a few slices, and ditto for the egg. I did not happen 

to have fresh strawberries, so I omitted them. I cannot positively identify the whitish 

vegetable in the back of the bowl, but it might be the white portion of a green onion, so I 

garnished the bowl with some green onions. It appears that the bowl in the photo was 

garnished with some crushed peanuts, but I omitted that too. Sorry.

The other issue in making this dish was getting the broth right, since it needed to be a

delicate melange and all. I figured I would do this right by starting with a base of homemade

chicken stock (there's the gelatin!), to which I added a hearty splash of sake, several hearty 

dashes of some very hot chili powder, and two dainty splashes of rice vinegar. I completely 

and totally forgot about the sugar in this recipe, but I used a pretty low-grade sake, so it was

plenty sweet regardless. Always taste and adjust seasonings, especially when making oddball 

flavor combinations!

Other than a few ingredient substitutions, I made the recipe as written, even managing to

soft-boil an egg perfectly, which I can almost never do. And the taste was...alright, actually.

I probably overdid the chili powder, but the sweetness of the jam cut it nicely, and the

broth itself was so good that my husband told me I need to make regular ramen with it. Even

the onion didn't clash with the rest of the flavors. The only main problem was that the jam

bascially overpowers the other elements of the dish when you get a bite with jam. Maybe

it's because I didn't use organic strawberry jam, or maybe it wouldn't have been quite so

sweet with homemade jam, but it didn't ruin the noodles regardless.

I ended up thinking I would probably eat this outside of novelty purposes, but my husband

disagreed. Regardless, it was a pleasure getting to taste test such an odd recipe from such a

beloved-but-odd story. Thanks, Project Siren, for your culinary contributions to the world!